How Hot Are You?

Have you ever wondered if you are truly hot or not? It was previously a matter of opinion, as beauty was deemed to be in the eye of the beholder. But, that was before we applied science to the question and came up with our fun, but reliable set of indicators that directly address the question, and the result is an irrefutable score you can share with your friends.

Want to find out? Answer the questions honestly to find your one time only, never to be argued with answer. Are you ready to find out if you are Hot or Not?

1. What reaction do you get when walking down the street?

Wolf whistles, guys bump into lampposts, and the occasional car crash

The occasional smile

You don't get far before the local dog pound ranger pulls up and chucks you in the back of his van

3. You're standing with your friends when a random person comes up to you and asks you out. What do you do?

Say to that person "I like your approach, now let's see your departure"

You try to remain calm, however you let out a high pitched squeal and jump up and down screaming "Yes, Yes, Yes..."

Remaining calm, you resist the impulse to cringe or laugh, but calmly reply with "In your dreams..."

Keep them interested until you've had a couple more drinks, then decide.

4. Which of these sounds familiar? "I've seen you before somewhere, are you:"

An actress?

A model?

The woman from the gastric band advert?

The lady in the hair net on the supermarket cheese counter?

6. Your perfect meal is:

Lobster, salad, Prosecco

Pasta, salad, red wine

Pie, chips, another pie cos you're really hungry, more chips, then cake, followed by double tiramisu and the cheeseboard

7. It's a very hot day down the beach, what do you wear?

Full wetsuit

Bikini

Onesie

One-peice

8. You stay in shape by:

Regular yoga

Spinning

Lift cigarette to mouth, lower cigarette, raise beer to mouth, lower beer, and repeat...

9. You're at a pool party, you slip and fall in the pool, what do you do?

Laugh and invite everyone in with you

Try and hold your breath underwater until the party is over

Emerge gracefully from the pool like a goddess, wet clothes clinging

10. Your hair:

Is your lustrous, bouncy pride and joy

Is a home for sparrows

Gets occasional compliments

11. Your feet:

Are smooth, shapely well-manicured visions of perfection

Not exactly perfect, but, that's because I work out a lot

An ointment covered mess of corn plasters and bunions

12. You are most likely to be invited to appear:

In a police line-up

In a swimsuit photo shoot

As a nurse in a medical soap opera

As a film extra for the witches scene in a production of Macbeth

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